You know those days
when your major accomplishment is keeping the kids alive…and fed…oh, and
various diapers/pull-ups changed and potty breaks?! I seem to be having a lot
of those recently…way, too, many!
Granted, I have five children, the youngest being nearly 12
months. My husband has been gone for two weeks and will be gone for a week
more, so that’s….hard. But still, I want to be able to get more done and feel
better about my general parenting/staying-at-home-ishness. It is after all, my
job. When filling out certain paperwork, under MY job description, I write
HOMEMAKER. That is what I am doing, making a home, maintaining a home and,
above all, raising; strong willed, independent, loud, smart, ornery, energetic,
caring, not-so-caring, challenging, enthusiastic, hungry, temperamental,
emotional, cranky, fun-loving, curious, wide-eyed, sweet(ish), sassy, imaginative,
and creative children. I war within myself when I write that title:
HOMEMAKER!??...!! I’m proud that this is
my chosen profession and yet, I wonder why I am doing something that is so
stinking hard and often times not-at-all satisfying and then I feel a little
like “eh”, it’s what I’m doing and sure, why not…then usually, I’ll circle back
around to “Yes, that’s right, I MAKE A HOME!!!” I usually only shout that in my
head, because no one around me doing their own paperwork challenged me on my
life choices so, why should they suffer?!
In a typical job, you might get a raise for doing well,
build up vacation days (and use them!!), get useful feedback from your peers or
your boss. It’s quite different when you’re a homemaker. If you get feedback from
someone who is not your kid, it most often times turns out to be “wow, you’ve
got your hands full”, or the not-so-sly disapproving glances at an outburst
from one or all of your children. Kid feedback is even more fun with such sweet
nuggets of “when I grow up I’m going to have the lion I buy eat you.”
A “raise” would be
considered FINALLY potty training the kid that was so disinterested just eight
months earlier and who stayed for the longest time in the phase where ‘if they
were in a pull-up they would just use it like a diaper anyways’, sooooo YAY, no
more carrying that size of diaper or asking if they need to go potty every ten
minutes only to find that they went 35 seconds ago…I just got a “mommy raise”.
Vacation is not even a word I’m familiar with, I’m sure it
has something to do with having fun “outside of the home” without a child
grafted to my body, but I really don’t know, hopefully I’ll be able experience
this before I die.
Compensation, well, I get a bit more touchy when it comes to
this subject. My mother, who successfully raised six (not easy) children as a
homeschooling(!), homemaker says that it’s all worth it in the end. She touts
the relationships she has with us and the enjoyment of our children as her
reward. I guess I’m not so much of a saint, because, I would love to see an
advancement check for all my labor. Now, I’m not so incredibly calloused and
horrid that I don’t see those little moments of joys and laughter for what they
are, success at “Homemaking”. But, a little appreciation (vocalized) from my
children or applause when I walk in the door with an armful of groceries, or
even $1,673,291 in hard cold cash (I’ve done a little math…), would go a long
way with me.
Most of the time I’m defiantly proud of my JOB, it’s hard, I
don’t always like it, but, I feel very strongly that it is the most important
thing I will do with my life. I want to do it well, I want my kids to be happy,
fulfilled and loved…it’s my JOB!