I am sure that out there in the world, there are countless books on motivation. How to get motivated is probably the main focus of such books. I have absolutely no desire to read a single one of them. When I sit in a messy house, one that grows messier by the minute (when the children are awake) I tend to feel highly UN-motivated. I suspect that reading a book that will give me advice on finding my motivation will do me no good. The reason I suspect this is because; the source of (most) of my UN-motivated feelings is my children. Why is it that a child can't play neatly? What drives them to touch the walls on their very short walk from the table to the bathroom?? Do they really have to put every item they've handled throughout the day on the floor??? My poor drawers and shelves, they look so lonely and bare!
I thrive on a clean and orderly home! I enjoy organizing and cleaning. Yet, I do not want to do either of these things right now, because I know that in a fraction of a minute they will be undone. There is no place in my house that is untouched. MY room is the catch-all room where things get put when I don't have the time or the "proper" place to put them. The kids take over both living rooms almost immediately and their bedrooms are really just a constant invitation to throw bedding in a pile on the floor and jump into it. Don't let me get started on bathrooms, except to say that toilet paper rolls FULL of toilet paper are my nightmare!!!! The kitchen could almost be my sanctuary if it weren't for the need of being cleaned THREE TIMES A DAY!! I do not currently have a pantry, or enough cabinet space, so my kitchen, even at it's cleanest has a decided "bursting at the seams" look to it.
It get's very discouraging. I can clean, and keep up tolerably well without my motivation, but it feels empty and temporary. I don't do the "deep" cleaning because there is no point. I know that all the work I do in a day (un-motivated) is just a band-aid. It just takes the wind out of my sails.
